How do you manage to describe erotic scenes?

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Chair Bound
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Joined: 01 Sep 2020, 15:09
Location: Ukraine

How do you manage to describe erotic scenes?

Unread post by passioncraftstore »

My friend is a writer. A few days ago, she gave me drafts of her erotic novel to read (because one day she bet that I would be the first reader of her forever ha-ha) and I was amazed at her skill in describing sex scenes! To be honest, I was a little jealous, because in my works I avoid sex scenes, because I can't describe them! She described everything with deliberate realism, especially when describing devices for such plays (a story based on quick bondage BDSM topic). Once someone told me that in order to write well about something, you have to go through it. But I'm not sure if my friend is into BDSM. How do I know for sure though? In general, I have nothing against it, but I so wanted to experience that quivering excitement before the toy that the main character felt...

I have a great idea for my story, but I cannot imagine either tactile or visual range of my story. I will be glad to any advice or recommendations!

Thank you for attention,
love you.

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Tightly Hogtied
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Re: How do you manage to describe erotic scenes?

Unread post by Tesgri »

Well first off you have to define the style you want to achieve, and experiencing something certainly helps but sometimes we just have to draw on imagination mixed with various other events in an amalgamation of thought.

For example, in the book I'm writing, I personally have never been violently choked - but I have been assaulted, and I have been choked (breath play, albeit very brief) - and those together can form a basis for how it may feel to be thrust up against a wall and choked.

If you want your story to be heavily biased towards physical (objects, persons) descriptions then draw on parts of your life that would fit. Anticipation, sexual tension, arousal, the agonizing pleasure of being on the edge, the feel of the toys, how silicone or plastic feels to the touch. Throw them in a pot and mix it all together and you'll have a basis for such a scene.

Of course this is my style and it may not work for everyone. My current book however is not physically descriptive, it's based on psychological and personal observation. Written in first person with no exposition (what the character knows is what's written, nothing more) so it's a lot of internal thought about her situation and conversations, rather than the shade of green in her shirt. The reason my book is easy for me to write is that I've experienced most if not all of the aspects of it, in some form or another, and if I do write something I've never done my wife makes sure I do it...

I hope this helps, I'm more than happy to talk further as needed. Writing has been a passion of mine since I was a child and I'm more than 120,000 words into my current book so it's something I have quite a bit of experience with :)

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